A little insight...no one cares!

12-7-11 

I’m starting to like this blog thing a little-honestly, I have no idea who is reading this, if anyone is, but it’s sort of become a mini personal journey for me, and blogging makes me feel like there’s someone out there who may get a little something from my thoughts and stories and if not, well that’s the beauty- I never have to know!

This place, or rather-this journey and these places have a way of making you realize how completely insignificant you are in this world. I mean, seriously-no one cares, no one cares about where you grew up, who your parents are, what school you went to, what you ate for breakfast, who your best friend is- I mean, maybe I’m being dramatic-yes, people care…but not really. As soon as you step food out of your little world where people know you and care about you, no one else does. You are only what you present yourself to be-nothing more, nothing less. You could have all the education in the world, you could have been to the Olympics, shit-you could be an Olympic gold medalist and there are still millions of people who will never know your name.

For so long, I’ve been wrapped up in my little swimming/school cocoon-thinking that in order for people to accept me, for people to think I’m a good or even great person that I had to accomplish certain things, certain tangible things during my swimming career. Eventually I let those feelings get the best of me and I stopped enjoying the sport that I loved so dearly as a child, the idea of failing to accomplish goals that I thought would help me gain recognition and acceptance completely consumed me and started to make me hate the sport. I mean, some of you know what I am talking about--the famous Bahamian saying “oh you went to the Olympics-you win da gold?!” I don’t know about you-but I find that hilarious, people always trying to downplay what you did. And if you did win a medal, they’d probably say something about how you cheated LOL

And it’s true-in some extremely small circles, those things do matter a lot-like say, on Auburn swim team-well it would matter a lot, but after those 4 intense years, that gold medal will do nothing for you if you haven’t developed as a person and can’t impress people with your ability to pursue life passionately in whatever you chose to do. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not downing the gold medal-I’m just realizing that everyone can’t be that, but that doesn’t make you less of a person, less of an athlete, less of anything, it just makes you-you-and it you’re being the best you can, people notice that and that is a worldwide language. I’m finding it more and more important to be passionate about what you’re pursuing, no matter what it is, because at the end of the day you can only be one very tiny person in this gigantic world. So that is my lifelong goal, to maintain passion in everything I do-to search for that passion, to empower others to show the same-to use the things I love to help others. Trust me, it’s not about you or me-no one cares.